QuarterLife Girl Gets Fit!

Reality Check

Posted on: January 5, 2010

I’ve experienced a series of reality checks this week. None particularly good. (Are they ever good?)

1) I realized that although I’ve been working out every day for the past 3 weeks, I’ve still gained weight. THAT is how much crap I’ve been eating.

2) I realized that the BF has lost weight, and I have gained weight….to the point that he now weighs 1 pound less than I do. HOLY CRAP. (And that is WITH all the muscle he has gained.)

3) I realized that I’m back at the weight I was when I started this blog. While that wasn’t my rock bottom, that’s when I started to feel desperate to lose weight. Why am I not feeling the same desperation now? Have I become complacent? Do I need my mirrors replaced?!

Anyway, the second realization led me into a kind of panic. (Some of you might laugh at my overreaction….but I still can’t shake it.) I weigh more than my BF. It’s like he WON or something….and I lost. And now I have no way of catching up unless I stop eating. I’m not sure why I can’t shake this feeling of urgency, but either way, it just discourages me because I know there’s no way I can just stop eating. Which makes me just want to give up and stuff my face with Archer Farms Cranberry Cinnamon Caramel Clusters. (Which, by the way, are banished from my apartment forever.) It makes me want to run away to get liposuction in some South American country….because that’s the only way I’ll lose the weight before he finds out.

Yes, I know I’m being ridiculous, but I can’t deny that I’ve had those thoughts.

On the bright side, I think I have the workout portion of the equation down. I’ve been working out consistently, and (dare I say it) I’ve even enjoyed most of those workouts. With the exception of the Yoga X, I look forward to my workouts (and I’m working on enjoying the yoga a little more….my balance just really sucks, lol). It’s slightly comforting to know that if I can just eat well I’ll go a lot farther with my weight loss.

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